Divine Revelation

I used to pray that G-d would reveal himself to me. Some have called this "The atheist's prayer". But there is something rational about it. We don't need proof that the material world exists; we just experience it. What is wrong with wanting to "sensually" experience G-d? How much doubt, suffering, anger would this resolve! No more arguments about the existence of G-d. No more arguing about what G-d really wants, whose religion is right.

But about a month ago I had another thought. What would I do if G-d actually revealed Himself to me personally? I couldn't take it. I'd probably go nuts. I don't think that I am a strong enough human being to survive such a revelation. So I recant my original desires. I don't want a personal revelation, but I still pray for a communal one. I guess this is another way of praying for the arrival of M'shiach. And maybe it makes this "religious atheist" a good Jew.

Gut Shabbos!