Sunday, August 24, 2008

In praise of philosophy...

NOT!

Immanuel Kant was a real pissant
Who was very rarely stable.

Heidegger, Heidegger was a boozy beggar
Who could think you under the table.

David Hume could out-consume
Wilhelm Friedrich Hegel,

And Wittgenstein was a beery swine
Who was just as sloshed as Schlegel.

There's nothing Nietzsche couldn't teach ya
'Bout the raising of the wrist.
Socrates, himself, was permanently pissed.

John Stuart Mill, of his own free will,
On half a pint of shandy was particularly ill.

Plato, they say, could stick it away--
Half a crate of whisky every day.

Aristotle, Aristotle was a bugger for the bottle.
Hobbes was fond of his dram,

And René Descartes was a drunken fart.
'I drink, therefore I am.'

Yes, Socrates, himself, is particularly missed,
A lovely little thinker,
But a bugger when he's pissed.



10 Comments:

Blogger Shoshana said...

Maybe ignorance really is bliss and all that thinking was really not so good for everyone's moods.

August 25, 2008 6:11 AM  
Blogger e-kvetcher said...

Well, I think the problem is more that trying to come up with a theory of how everything works without any kind of feedback mechanism from reality can lead to this navelgazing which sounds good but is ultimately pointless.

August 25, 2008 7:47 AM  
Blogger B. Spinoza said...

I don't think Spinoza had such problems

August 25, 2008 8:38 AM  
Blogger e-kvetcher said...

>I don't think Spinoza had such problems

You mean drinking problems or those I discussed in my previous comment?

August 25, 2008 8:48 AM  
Blogger B. Spinoza said...

well. he didn't have a drinking problem (that I'm aware of) and he thought his philosophy led to the highest human joy

August 25, 2008 9:47 AM  
Blogger B. Spinoza said...

Spinoza was a practical philosopher in the sense that he wanted to lead people to a life of joy and blessedness. He wasn't merely interested in theory for its own sake

August 25, 2008 9:50 AM  
Blogger Freethinking Upstart said...

what about pragmatism?

August 25, 2008 10:49 AM  
Blogger Miri said...

Pragmatism! I love pragmatism. it's the only sensible branch of philosophy.
as to the rest of it......I don't know the history of the personal alcohol abuse. But definitely spending too much time messing around with the spaces in between infinities inside your head can screw you up pretty bad. The trick is to stay in contact with reality. It's especially good if you've got a friend or relative there so you can visit occasionally.

oh, and btw? Wittgenstein was crazy enough on his own, he definitely didn't need the aid of mind-altering substances.

August 25, 2008 7:01 PM  
Blogger Freethinking Upstart said...

Miri,

>it's the only sensible branch of philosophy.

To which stripe of pragmatism are you referring?

August 26, 2008 7:45 PM  
Blogger Miri said...

I guess I'm mostly thinking of the works of James and Peirce; although, I only took one semester on the subject, so my experience with it is reasonably limited.

August 27, 2008 5:23 AM  

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